thirty-first.

principles learned:

• empathic listening
• put away agenda
• trust is built
• qualifiers: seems/sounds like
• used when trust is low, emotions are high
• validates emotion
• get what you need in communication/relationships
  
  • you can have someone listen actively or empathically for you
• you can probe when trust is high
• sometimes when listening you only have to peel off some layers of the onion
  
  • someone else later will come by and be able to peel off even more until the core is exposed
• saying, “i know you’re busy—just go” is the speaker giving the listener an easy way out

apply these principles:
the main principle i took away from today’s class is that we can get what we need in communicating. we have it in our power to ask someone how we want them to respond and to listen. granted this won’t always work if the person you are communicating with does not have respect for you. however, if we have problems in communicating, it is in our power to find solutions. therefore, i want to try to ask someone i am speaking with to listen empathically.

teach: to james

report:
teaching james about the principle of being able to get what we need in relationships we took it upon ourselves to make the other aware when we are not receiving the things which we think we need. if the problem cannot be remedied, then we want to be open to being able to solve through other means (ie the example of the couple and birthday/anniversary presents)